Year: 2023
Platform: PlayStation 4
Developer: Monster Bath Games
Genre: Action
Review Date: 2/28/26
Rating: ***

"Deathwish Enforcers" is a retro-inspired "run and gun" game, or in this case, a "walk and gun" game, since the characters move at such an incredibly slow speed. It's 1969 and the streets of San Francisco are littered with crime, drugs, pimps, hookers, and... zombies? The setting looks and feels more like mid-70's grindhouse cinema than late 60's, but there's no continuity and it bounces all over the place including Pimp Street, the waterfront, a haunted graveyard and mansion, a desert, and a jungle with a secret volcano lair. There's no story or discernable objective, apart from "kill everything that's in your way," which eventually leads to several boss battles. The "heroes" in this adventure are four hotheaded, loose cannon cops named "Filthy" Larry Hardwood, Chuck Bronxman, Diana Bangg, and Cleopatra Love. Larry and Chuck are obviously based on Clint Eastwood and Charles Bronson, and Cleo is clearly inspired by either Pam Grier (Coffy) or Tamara Dobson (Cleopatra Jones). However, the role model for the purple-haired, go-go boots wearing Diana is unclear. Possibly Diana Rigg's Emma Peel, which fits the nameplay, but isn't exploitive enough. Maybe she's just a generic sexy white chick like Cheri Caffaro or one of "Charlie's Angels." Regardless, they all pretty much play the same. They fire guns at far away targets, and kick and punch opponents who get a little too close.

Everything I've read about the game compares it to Konami's "Sunset Riders," and one article even said that it was built using the same game engine. I've never played "Sunset Riders," so the closest things I can compare it to are "Contra" and "Streets Of Rage." I'm always on the lookout for a good beat 'em up game like SOR, so picking this up was a no-brainer. Unfortunately, the execution is lacking. First of all, the buttons are mapped all wrong and there are no options to re-map them. This gave me a constant handicap, because I was fighting 40+ years of muscle memory for similar games with attack and jump controls. Even so, the controls are very sluggish, and jumping and dodging are way more difficult than they should be. Even on the easiest setting, the game is HARD and the controls are always working against you. You get up to nine lives and nine continues, which get eaten up VERY quickly. The game's one saving grace, which was the only thing that kept me going, was that after you run out of continues, you have the option to start again at the last level you were on, so with about 200 lives I was finally able to get all the way through in about two hours. Boss battles are especially difficult and cheap. There's often no way to defend yourself and it's never clear what attacks will actually connect, so you can easily burn through 20-30 lives on a single boss fight. And since you move so slow, dodging isn't an option.

Despite all of the wonky gameplay issues, the look and sound of the game is great. The 2D pixel art is gorgeous and evokes the old Genesis/SNES gaming era. The soundtrack is outstanding and by far the best aspect of the game. The characters are fun and colorful, and I always appreciate some bad-ass "girls with guns" action. While the grindhouse aesthetic is nice, the writing and humor are overly juvenile. Crashing a porn studio and fighting Ron "Porn King" Bigly is tacky and crass, and the game is full of adolescent dick jokes that drag the experience down. The final villain, who only goes by "Big Boss X" and whose crimes are never called out, attempts to escape in a penis-shaped rocket called the "Kawkrawkit," and you have to, um, "bust his balls." It's very silly and childish.

That said, I did play through the game twice, just so I could experience both Diana and Cleo, and I definitely found more of a rhythm the second time through. Fortunately, it's a short game, and the "Streets Of Rage" action was exactly what I was looking for, even if it lacks polish and precision.