Year: 2018
Platform: PlayStation 4
Genre: Platform
Review Date: 7/4/25
Rating: **
A young woman named Madeline decides to climb Mount Celeste, although a crazy old woman warns her not to. And that's all I know about the game because that's as far as I got.
Lauded by many as the best platformer of all time, but it's important to not confuse "best" with "hardest." "Celeste" is relentlessly difficult, but not artificially so, and it's seldom unfair. While the controls are tight and responsive, the game requires laser focus, split-second timing, and pixel-precise control. Each screen presents a whole new dastardly environmental puzzle to navigate, and while success brings a brief moment of satisfaction, it's quickly replaced by the dread of the next punishing challenge - just like in real life. You will fail A LOT, but fortunately Madeline is quickly respawned so that you can try again with little interruption. The game is even gracious enough to let you save and quit on any screen so that you can return to the same spot. Unfortunately, after an hour of this abuse, I had blisters on my fingers and had to give up.
Let's face it. I'm 56 years old. I no longer have the time, patience, reflexes, coordination, stamina, motivation, and physical endurance of a teenager anymore, and games like this ask for more than I can give. This is disappointing and depressing in so many ways. The game is supposed to be this amazing journey of self-discovery as well as a story about mental illness and fighting personal demons, but I never made it far enough to encounter any of those elements. Proponents of the game argue that its difficulty IS the story, and if that's the case, then the story is, "Life is hard so you might as well just give up." But I'd like to think that the game has something a little more meaningful to say than that.
Presentation wise, I didn't get to see much of the game since I was soundly defeated by the first chapter, but the drab low-res pixel art didn't grab me and there wasn't enough variety to keep me visually engaged. The soundtrack is delightful, although its pleasant upbeat refrains seemed to mock my constant failure. Or perhaps it was meant to encourage me to keep trying. Regardless, if you're up for a challenge and have the patience and dexterity for nerve wracking platform action, "Celeste" is definitely worth a try. I'm just not that guy anymore, and haven't been for nearly forty years.