Rating: **
Review Date: 6/11/17
Cast: Barry Crocker, Barry Humphries, Mike Newman, Donald Pleasence
A delightfully rude, crude, and culturally insensitive slice of comic insanity from the 1970s. It's actually quite shocking to look back at that era and see just how different the world was, and how everything was fair game. These days, you wouldn't dare make racist, sexist, homophobic, religious, or cultural jokes anywhere near the brutally scathing level they are in this film, or you'd be banned from show business and never work again. If you're not easily offended, the film offers up some pretty funny stuff, provided you can get past the rapid-fire and often confusing Australian "dingo lingo."
Barry McKenzie (Barry Crocker) and his Aunt Edna (Barry Humphries) are flying to Paris when a couple of goons mistake Edna for Queen Elizabeth and kidnap her. It's all part of an elaborate plan by a vampire named Count Plasma (Donald Pleasence) to boost the Transylvanian tourism industry. Barry and his religious twin brother Kevin team up with a handful of other Australians to sneak into Transylvania and rescue Edna before Plasma realizes his error and bleeds her dry. The Foster's Lager flows freely and constantly, and is even used to combat vampires and kung fu masters. We also learn that vampires can be killed with sharpened baguettes. The production is extremely low budget and the ADR is appallingly bad - almost as if it were re-dubbed for the international market. The jokes and gags come at a blinding pace, and the sheer volume of colorful terms describing sex, urination, and genitalia is staggering. You definitely need a sharp ear and multiple viewings to catch everything that's said. And just what is Donald Pleasence doing in this film?!?
Here are a few of my favorite lines:
"Hope I didn't hit you with my gong-banger."
"I creamed my jeans just thinking about your top bollocks."
"I hope your balls turn to bicycle wheels and backpedal up your ass."
"I would have crawled over half a mile of broken glass just to hear that little sheila piss into an empty jam tin."
"I'm that randy I could root the hair on a barber shop floor."
"I'm busy as a one-armed taxi driver with crabs."
"I'm that thirsty I could drink out of a Japanese wrestler's jockstrap."
"Excuse me, I have to go rinse the prince."
"He gives away his asshole and shits through his ribs."