Sex Medusa (HK 2000)

Rating: *
Review Date: 10/23/04
Cast: Miho Nomoto, Tsui Kam Long, Carrie Ng

Ugh. Why in the world was this film made? And maybe more importantly, why did Media Blasters decide to import this steaming turd to the US, while plenty of good movies continue to languish in foreign obscurity? This film is utter crap, and only exists as an excuse to get the lovely Miho Nomoto naked. Now I'm a big fan of Ms. Nomoto, but this film exceeds the limits of my tolerance. Twenty minutes in I had to resort to fast-forwarding through the rest of the film. So, what do we have? Some strange eggs are found in the sewer, and one of them hatches into a giant snake before the rest are destroyed by a biohazard team. The giant snake turns into the beautiful Miho Nomoto, and comes under the care of the loveably nerdy Tsui Kam Long. She adapts to human life quickly and learns how to speak by watching TV, but her biological clock is ticking and she desperately needs to procreate. It's unclear what good will come from coupling with humans, but she tries anyway. One of Tsui's friends is in charge of a pharmaceutical company that's developing a new pesticide that causes pests to kill each other. Just think about the absurdity of that for a moment. Anyway, the lead scientist on the project is Carrie Ng (she must have been desperate for a paycheck), and she soon realizes that Ms. Nomoto is not what she seems. When Miho transforms into a ridiculous character with rainbow hair and silly plastic fangs, Carrie puts an end to her embarrassing role with a taste of her new pesticide.

Sheesh. Movies this bad require extra effort on the part of the filmmakers. Ms. Nomoto is lovely throughout, but that's not enough to make the film even remotely watchable. The writing, direction, and editing are atrocious, and the cheezy digital effects are downright embarrassing. There's also a fair amount of unnecessaary animal cruelty thrown in, just to make the whole thing even more distasteful. Avoid at all costs.